Eulogy to my Grandpa

A quote by Ann Landers: “The true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good.”

You were a class act. A neatly buttoned down crisp white shirt with pens and business cards packed tightly in your pocket. Your belt, with your pressed pants by Grandma (and -- your blue and black socks, because she would get her colors mixed up). Your hands would rest in your pockets, until of course -- you saw someone you knew; and then they would stretch out with open arms. Or, even if you saw someone you didn’t know, because in your eyes, everybody was your friend. Your grey hair was neatly combed back, your glasses resting on that Italian nose that I love. Your big eyes, and your even bigger smile. You were a Veteran. You served our country and our family as one in the same: with dignity, honor, and respect. Thank you for that, soldier. You served us well. You were Michael Ottilio. You were my Grandfather. You made me so proud.

It was simple to make you happy. A bulldozer, a home cooked Italian meal, your sweetheart Rosie, and a yard sale. You would bring home countless pieces of copper, road signs, books, furniture. When people think of Michael Ottilio, they think of his copper room. Grandma would joke that one day there wouldn’t be enough room to walk around their house. To you, Grandpa, there was no such thing as “JUNK”. You saw the beauty in everything.

I don’t think there is ONE bad thing that anybody in this room could say about you. I couldn’t think of a thing. The closest I could get to a flaw, was that you would eat all the food at family parties. Don’t worry Grandpa, you passed down your appetite to me. I’ll take it from here.

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew you were something special; when you let me drive a bulldozer when I was 11. But it was only after I grew older, that I figured you out; and I now believe in angels on Earth. You were a remarkable human being, a gift to mankind. You lit up a room. I wonder if you knew, you lit up lives too. Out of all the gifts you’ve given me, the best one has always been you: kind, warm, and selfless.

And as I grew older, I didn’t think it was possible to be inspired by you anymore, but it was. I would admire you and Grandma: Michael and Rose; the two people who lived their life in love, and never forgot how to love each other. I watched a video of you the other day, and in the mere 1:28 seconds that it was, that was enough for you to describe every inch of your love for Grandma. You spoke of the war, and you said, “She waited for me for 34 years!” (I corrected you – you mean months, Grandpa) “Oh yeah, 34 months! Well, it felt like years!”. Then you described Grandma when you reunited, “That red dress, and that long hair– WOOOO! Look out!” Then you shook your head, and your eyes set on Grandma as you admired her. “I love her, not because she’s good to me. But because she’s good to all.” You both were.

I’d watch the way you held her hand, the twinkle you’d still get in your eyes even after 63 years of marriage. Nothing speaks more of a couple who are truly happy and in love, when people who are around them can feel their love too. And as I was awe struck, you’d chime in with humor tell me, “Nicolette! Make sure you marry a man with a big nose like me!” It wasn’t your big nose, Gramps. It was your big heart.

My fondest memories are you pulling up to my house in your tan station wagon, my eyes lighting up because I knew Grandma & Grandpa were here. I’d run as fast as my little legs could take me and straight into your arms, where I always felt so safe. And then I’d hear your contagious and infectious laugh. And there has never been anything more genuine that I’ve ever witnessed in my 22 years, as it was when you could see a soul shine through a smile.

Because of you, I talk to “strangers”. Because of you, I eat my spaghetti and meatballs, and a lot of it.. Because of you, I now find the beauty in the simplest of things. It was a privilege to be your granddaughter, but much more so, it was a BLESSING to be loved by you.

On your last day on Earth, your aid, Paul, joked that he would let me know if he “saw Grandpa walking around.” It was then that it dawned on me, and I said “You know something, Paul? I wouldn’t be surprised if his spirit came up to you with a nice, firm hand shake and said, 'Ya did a great job, Paul. Ya did a great job!'"

I consider myself so so lucky, to have spent your final minutes with you. I put my hand on your chest, I listened to your heart -- until I could listen no more. It was then that I whispered in your ear..

“Grandpa, YOU did a Great job.”